You're really pretty! :D and your birthday is three days before mine. Three years after, too :P hm. What are your favorite movies?
Aww, thank you so much ^^ and awesome :D I’ll have to remember that so I can wish you a happy birthday on the day ^^ I have lots of favourite movies :P Jackass 1, 2 and 3, Breakfast At Tiffany’s, Some Like It Hot, Scott Pilgrim Vs The World, Superbad, Thelma and Louise, Funny Face… Soooo many haha
Is that too much to ask? Really? I don’t want drugs or therapy or for someone to tell me it’s all in my mind and that things get better when they have no idea how my mind works. Just for someone to love me, whom I adore more than anything else in the world and someone who can save me from thinking that life is just a loop of misery, a good event, temporary joy, then misery again.
Anything they’ll prescribe won’t make the situation any better. They won’t make you happy. They simply make you less sad. They numb you. Depression is human. Happiness is human. Feeling nothing at all, on the other hand, is not.
I don’t want to wake up every morning wishing I hadn’t and thinking “There is nothing that could happen today that could make me feel anything other than irritation, anger, pain or sorrow.”
I’m not going to kill myself because I’m too stubborn to let the things bringing me down take me over and I’m too scared to pull the trigger because I don’t know what happens after you die. No one knows.
Sometimes, I’ll watch a video, listen to an interview or a song, look out of the window and smile and think to myself ‘everything’s going to be okay, I’m strong, I’m confident.’ Sometimes even ‘I’m a beautiful human being’ but it doesn’t last long until I look in the mirror and see something that repulses me. A grotesque, ugly, fat and evil thing. My enemy. Myself.
I understand this writing is long and boring and I doubt anyone will have read this but this is a blog and I needed to let something out. Not that it’s going to do any good. I am mentally fucked and there’s nothing I can do about it.